Everyday Jokes xD

I'am going to post a joke everyday in this forums. You could also share your jokes, but what I just don't want is spamming this thread. I wanted this thread to be neat.

Joke of the day:

Confessions of a Kid

Little Bobby came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted.


"Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."


Little Bobby was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble atschool and at home. Bobby's mother asked him if he thought he deservedto get a bike for his birthday. Little Bobby, of course, thought hedid. Bobby's mother wanted Bobby to reflect on his behavior over the last year.

"Go to your room, Bobby, and think about how you have behaved thisyear.Then write a letter to God and tell him why you deserve a bike for your birthday."

Little Bobby stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter.

Letter 1
Dear God,

I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one.

Your friend,
Bobby

Bobby knew that this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this year, so he tore up the letter and started over.

Letter 2
Dear God,

This is your friend Bobby. I have been a good boy this year and I would like a red bike for my birthday. Thank you.

Your friend,
Bobby

Bobby knew that this wasn't true either. So, he tore up the letter and started again.

Letter 3
Dear God,

I have been an OK boy this year. I still would really like a bike for my birthday.

Bobby

Bobby knew he could not send this letter to God either. So, Bobby wrote a fourth letter.

Letter 4
God,

I know I haven't been a good boy this year. I am very sorry. I will be a good boy if you just send me a bike for my birthday.

Please! Thank you,

Bobby

Bobby knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get him abike. Now, Bobby was very upset. He went downstairs and told his momthat he wanted to go to church. Bobby's mother thought her plan hadworked, as Bobby looked very sad.

"Just be home in time for dinner", Bobby's mother told him.

Bobby walked down the street to the church on the corner. Little Bobbywent into the church and up to the altar. He looked around to see ifanyone was there. Bobby bent down and picked up a statue of the Mary.He slipped the statue under his shirt and ran out of the church, downthe street, into the house, and up to his room. He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen.

Bobby began to write his letter to God.

Letter 5
God,

I'VE KIDNAPPED YOUR MAMA. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND ME THE BIKE!!!!!!

lololololz nice one dude keep em cming.

maybe i will post some some time later

Joke of the day:

Sunday School Lesson

Little Janice was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me Janice, who created the universe?" When Janice didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.

"God Almighty!" shouted Janice and the teacher said, "Very good" and Janice fell back asleep.

A while later the teacher asked Janice, "Who is our Lord and Saviour." But, Janice didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.

"Jesus Christ!" shouted Janice and the teacher said, "Very good," and Janice fell back asleep.

Then the teacher asked Janice a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" and again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin.

This time Janice jumped up and shouted, "If you stick me with that thing one more time, I'll break it in half and stick it up your ass!"

... the teacher fainted!

we want more :D can u post more :

Here's from my side.

Essential
Desert Objects

A judge was punishing three men because they had committed a crime. Their sentence was a few years in the desert. He said that they could each take one thing with them.


The first guy decides to take an umbrella, so that he can have shade whenever he wants.

The second guy decides to take a water bottle so that he won't get thirsty.

Finally, the third guy decides to take a car door.

The judge asked, "Why in the world would you want to take a car door?" The man replies, "Just in case it gets hot, I can roll down the window."

A new Twillight for every fan of this movie:

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1924837

joke name:Oh!! Please..
one day the skh very dark! A man and woman in the park ,and the man start to kiss the woman!
the conversation is:
Woman: Oh! Please don't touch me!
Oh! Please don't touch...!
Oh! Please ...don't......!
Oh! Please...............!
Oh!....Oh!.....Oh!.....Oh

hsiaouin wrote:joke name:Oh!! Please..
one day the skh very dark! A man and woman in the park ,and the man start to kiss the woman!
the conversation is:
Woman: Oh! Please don't touch me!
Oh! Please don't touch...!
Oh! Please ...don't......!
Oh! Please...............!
Oh!....Oh!.....Oh!.....Oh

Wahahaha.